at least that's what the internet tells me
apparently they did a study about 'lurking'
they found it's depressing
i mean
everybody looks so damn happy
see,
nobody posts pictures of them vomiting,
overeating, shitting or crying from emotions overwhelming
but either way, everyone else seems to have it all figured out
the teens i shot heroin with in college now have kids
and tattoos and cool jobs
successful dads and moms
albeit, the tats cover up the track marks
but they still look rad
and my brown skin still has scars on it
that make me feel the bad kind of black
if i could take it back i would never have faked my own death
i was just obsessed
manic and depressed simultaneously
which is a mind fuck if you ask me
which you didn't
because you don't exist
or at least not at the moment
but if you read this
know that i too don't really exist
none of us do
well, except on the internet
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